Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Am I a Redneck?

My husband posed a question to me that I really hadn't thought of and I guess I have tried to ignore ever since he asked it.

Ham often crawls around in a diaper. Just a diaper.

And she never wears shoes (I have been told by the pediatrician and my chiropractor that it's best not to put babies in hard-soled shoes). That may be why she has excellent balance and can stand while clapping or 'dancing' without holding onto anything.

So, the other day, Genius asked me how many parents we knew that probably let their babies crawl around in just a diaper. My reply, "I dunno."

He mentioned one of my friends in particular who has quite a bit of style and has grown up with quite a bit of money. He said that he couldn't imagine her letting her baby go all day (around the house) in a diaper. He wasn't trying to knock me...I don't think...or her...I'm sure of that...but he was "just wondering."

This is the thing. Ham HATES clothing. I think she would even rip her diaper off if she could figure out the Velcro and something tells me that she isn't far from learning how to do that.

She also hates shoes (I've tried putting some cute little soft-soled shoes on her).

However, she acts like she doesn't even know how to crawl when she has shoes on.

It's like when you put clothes on a cat. They just lay there like they've gone catatonic....

OK, I didn't even mean to do that!

So, I don't make her wear clothes if she doesn't have to, right? I don't make her wear cutesy shoes, so what? I mean, it's been a blazing 90-something degrees for a while now (not counting the unnaturally cool nights we've had lately thanks to El Nino).
Does my half-naked baby mean that we are rednecks?

I don't cart her around like that outdoors! Uhh...I mean.

Do you notice that I also let my child eat dirt and leaves?

Well, it was hot these days!

If anything, I go TOO far when we go out to run errands.

Dress, check. Diaper cover (I prefer to call them 'bloomers'), check. Bow in her sparse hair, check. What else is there? A purse? Lipstick? Glitter fingernail polish? Diamond earrings? BLLLLEEEECCCKKKK! No thanks. She doesn't even get to take her lovey with her!

I'm such a meanie.

Besides, I love looking at her, count 'em, FOUR rolls that get hidden by clothes she doesn't even like. If I'm a Redneck, then I guess I'll just have to live with it.

However, I will say that this is totally unnecessary exposure. This was at our Family Reunion. Usually at least 10 people are around at any given time.


Allyson said...

You are NOT a redneck! Our girls go around in just a diaper all the time. I mean, its so much easier, they are more comfortable, and cleanup after eating is much better. I would say we are just smart mommies! Not rednecks!

And Kudos to Sophie for standing and clapping on her own! The girls CAN stand, but they kind of freak out when they realize it and sit down really fast :) She will be walking so soon!

And where did you get those bows and where do you find bloomers?

glorybaby1 said...

That post cracked me up (no pun intended...)! I can't believe the rolls - my little guy doesn't have a single one! Kids are all so unique. It's obvious you love being a mommy. Thanks for the late night/early morning entertainment :)